Reprise 3

Today's look back is about logging your food.  I love logging, I believe in logging and I hope you will give it a try. 

Workshop Update

So, the latest on the workshop?  Alicia and I are trying to work on a date.  We have narrowed it down to the first two weeks in August.  It will be on a Tuesday or Wednesday.  There is a cost of $45. 

For those of you that don't know, Alicia is a sought after speaker and TV and radio personality.  Getting a chance to work with her is like being on TLC's "What Not To Wear".  She is also very budget minded and is often seen checking out the sale rack at Target.  She can pull an outfit together like no other and after she has given you advice you will feel like a million bucks.

I am so excited for this opportunity.  If you are stuck in a rut then this will be the best money you have spent on yourself.  Hope to see you then!

Shooting Up

Labels, whether good or bad, need to go away along with the unwanted pounds.  Negative self talk is a real killer.  Food is the weapon and not having any sympathy and love for yourself is the pulled trigger.  A lot of energy is spent on changing the weapon or going for smaller ammunition.  That can stop you from killing yourself but, damage can still happen being shot too many times with just a paintball gun.

Other people play Russian roulette.  Their self loathing can't let go of the big guns.  They want to have their cake and eat it too.  There is nothing wrong with foods you enjoy  but if the need is physiological, problems happen.  There are times when these types are in control of their emotions, eat the food, and are fine.  Other times the chamber holds a bullet and BANG.  It is a delicate line.  You can eat any food you wish - I really believe that.   However, wanting to enjoy them and needing them to make life worth while are very different.  They both look the same from the outside and even from the inside sometimes.

Spending some time alone with yourself figuring yourself out does wonders for making your journey easier.  Ask yourself questions.  If, like me, the thought of giving up chocolate chip cookies for life sends tears to your eyes, go toward it.  Go through the emotions don't run from them.  They are the key to putting down the guns all together.

[I drafted this post before I read  "Women Food and God" and was saying "yes!" all the way through it.]     
 
      

Dear UncomfortableInMyBody

 Yes, now we are getting somewhere!

 You are so not alone in your thoughts.  Skinny people are an in-your-face proof that you have failed.  I hear ya. 

As with anything difficult, at the end of it one looks back and says “that wasn’t so hard”.  It is so hard to understand that at the beginning of the journey.  The path looks too hard.  But, one step at a time gets you there.  You can have that experience too.  I know you can.  There are a few things that are holding you back. 

Your key to success lies in “it makes me feel bad, weak and helpless”.    You can’t surrender your power that way.  No one should have enough power to affect you like that.  Sure, you are not all made of steel – others can hurt your feelings.  But, when those hurts shape your own opinion of yourself, we have a dilemma. (and I mean we)

If you do not feel worthy enough where you are, then that is your greatest obstacle.  You are probably extra bothered by women that don’t struggle with their worthiness.   Women are taught to be ashamed of themselves in order to be humble and when somebody doesn't follow suit they are a witch with a "B" (keepin' it clean).  If a group of women were asked to raise their hand if they thought they were beautiful, pretty close to none would raise their hands.  If men were asked if they were good looking, close to all would raise their hand. 

What if you were the only one to raise your hand?  What would be the worst that would happen?  What if all the other women looked at you and rolled their eyes at you?  What if they all laughed?  Sure, I would be hurt or embarrassed at first but I would take some time and, in the end, know that my definition of beautiful doesn’t have to match theirs.  I only need to convince myself – others’ agreement does not make something true. No one really sees all our beauty.  We show it in all we say and do more than what colors of light reflect back in a mirror. 

You have to take responsibility for your feelings.  You, get to!  From this moment on you do not have to follow any rules - you get to make them.  There are consequences to some choices but you have every right to choose for yourself.  Choose once to take a different path than the one your brain wants to and it will get easier from there on.  Start with a positive thought when a negative thought enters you mind. 

Thank you for your honesty.  You are a hero for speaking out.  You are worth the effort.  Failure can only be defined by you.  Here is my step one.  Good luck to you!       

Reprise 2

           This post is one of my favorites.  December 2009   I am currently reading "Women Food and God" and this post goes right a long with it.  I still need to take my own advice every so often.  Food will always be an easy fix to life's stresses but just having that knowledge on my side helps tremendously.    

Reprise 1

I wanted to link back to some of my classic posts just for fun.   August 2009 has to be top of the list.  Someday these pictures will come back to haunt me - no running for office I guess.  I want to make the point loud and clear that underneath it all no one has the perfect body.  Clothes are a good thing;D  No worries.  (I am not naked or anything, just proof that bikinis are out for me)

The middle of the night

I was awoken at 3am bothered about this blog.  I honestly want to help others achieve pride in their bodies (yes, it can be done).  I worried if I was writing a brag instead of a blog.  I hope not.  If I could give away 5 pounds of healthy weight loss to everyone, I would love it.  Being thin is not the reason, accomplishment and that facing-the-fear triumph is why.

I honestly want to hear your road blocks.  Your hard days.  Your good days.  I want to be your cheerleader as you live your life trying to be healthy.  I want to hear your smallest achievements so I can help you see how they are big.  I want to learn from you and, in turn, teach others as well.  There are so many of us that struggle - more than don't.  Our health and vitality is on the line.  So many people are feeling the effects of weight as it takes it's toll later in life.  They wish they could go back in time and choose differently. Now is your time, your opportunity to invest in yourself for the future.  Make one change and be proud!

My Food Fav's

Some of my favorite "diet" foods, or foods that have become important

since my "awakening" are ...

Fat free cottage cheese - use as a side, a dip or a spread on a sandwich and skip the cheese and mayo

Sun chips or chips that have under 150 calories for at least a serving of 15 chips or more.  Sometimes you just need something salty and crunchy

  Light yogurt helps digestion and I always like the scale better when digestion is good;o

 Fiber one bars (chocolate 90 cals or oats and caramel) they curb the craving and the hunger

 Mixed veggies are a must.  I buy frozen stir fry blends - they are much more interesting.  Check out the frozen veg section sometime and you will be in love.  

Salad - think a lot of textures and colors like beans, frozen peas, meat, banana peppers,carrots, tomatoes, cucumbers, weird cheeses etc.  If you can throw together a yummy salad at any time you are doing a good job at the grocery store

   

Variety of fruits - I was surprised at how delicious an orange or melon could be.

 Baby carrots - I don't loooove carrots but as a side at lunch they are a great in between bite

Soy milk smoothies - chocolate and berry YUM!

Jelly Belly - watch your next movie with these and you will understand the plot before too many calories are gone - 140 for 35 bellies. Buy the smaller packages even if the larger is the better deal.

Godiva pearls!! I repeat 25 calories for 8 - perfect for an afternoon chocolate rampage (of course I eat more than one serving) If you are eating handfuls at once then something is up mentally.  You are stressed.  They each deserve their own moment to shine. 

These are really my staples. When it comes to buying foods to keep me going I ignore the price tag. No matter the cost, the medical bills later would certainly be more. I try to load my plate with more than one thing. Rarely do I have a one pot dish. I try to add vegetables or salads to give variety and keep me eating slower. I find the more variety the more excited I am about eating and that is always the goal. I make hamburgers and instead of fries I have steamed veggies on the side - the kids don't seem to care (granted, they eat only one or two bites). I was always shoving a handful of fries into my mouth as I cleared their plates anyway.

My biggest food advice would be to have your own advice. Read labels and do research on food and then find ways to choose a little better option. I am amazed at how I am perfectly fine as long as the general need or want is met.  I am always in need of new ideas.  What are some of your favorites?

Some Advice from YouTube.

Here are a few tips.  Pay attention to your guilt factor while you watch.  There is nothing really extreme here but the old me would have had all sorts of anxiety.  Taking time to face some of those fears can make this journey a lot easier.  Most of the time the fear is way more fearful than the object feared.  (how is that for some Freud?)

I did learn a few things.  When the "switch" happens you get obsessed with getting new ideas and hearing others' advice and tips.  At least this blog hopes so;D   

It is all in the past

This post is a little strange and I am not sure what I think until I get it out.  So here goes.  My attempt is to provide some motivation as well as knowledge that will make your journey look a little easier.  I also want to try to take away some of the guilt associated with weight because that guilt can reek havoc on your success.

When we deal in the basics, we know that extra fat is the stored energy the body did not need.  I will refer to these as calories whether they came from fat or sugar or whatever.  Let's say that you have 35,000 calories that need to be burned (roughly 10 pounds).  Some where along the way those calories were consumed but not burned.  If you are not gaining weight at a steady level then you are just not burning those calories.  You are not a big fat pig that cannot control themselves.  If you call yourself that then you are dealing with the past you, not this current you.  Chances are you are not downing an extra 3500 calories ever single week thereby gaining a pound a week, 52 pounds a year.  You are only maintaining your weight.  You had a rough spot - child birth, stress, illness, changes in our body's chemicals can all cause weight gain.  We were "out of control" - in the past.  (If you are steadily gaining weight then we have other things that need to be worked on before food becomes the main issue.) 

This is good news because it tells us that we do not have to completely change our habits, we just have to alter them.  Reducing your calories does not a tragedy make.  Small changes add up over time.  Remember to not judge success based on time or compared to another.  When you truly succeed you will know. 

  

My Tricks

Jennie, here are my tricks.  Get a pencil so you can write them down....

            I don't have any tricks.

I have a thought process that took a while to develop - years in fact.  I knew somewhere deep inside that I could not live a life of can't.  How could I make a choice to be thin and "can" at the same time?  

When I go to put something in my mouth there is a split second where I listen to see if the angel on the right side is hungry or the devil on the left side wants to eat.  The devil longs for comfort, feels deserving and has a certain whining sound.  If the devil is talking, I stop and think about what is going on.  Just like in the Oprah on Wednesday, if there is something wrong I figuratively put my arm around myself and give myself the comfort it is after.   I try to sympathize with myself rather than scold myself. Sometimes the something is obvious but not always.  Usually for me it is a feeling of being out of control or insecure or even a little panicky - the devil would shovel whatever food in as fast as she could between large gasps of air.  Sometimes I eat the food but most of the time a single taste will do.  If the devil gets the attention it really wants the desire for the food changes.  

The Book From Oprah 5/12/2010.  Watch the episode...so good!

The angel loves food.  She gets giddy when she gets fed.  She eats happily and confidently.  I would dare say that I wouldn't gain a pound no matter what I was eating as long as the angel requested it.  That leg slappin' mint brownie was all angel.  I was giving myself a treat - not in a medicating way but a great big "you are terrific".  

All women need to know and understand, without a shadow of a doubt, they are divine.  We give life.  How much more divine can you get?  We have real emotions and feelings - they don't have to make sense.  They don't even need to be acted on but they do deserve acknowledgment.  We would care for and lift others in their troubles, we should do the same with ourselves.    

The workshop is probably going to be at my house.  We want an intimate place where people can change clothes easily.  It will be a small group with a lot of one on one attention.
Come!     

Give Yourself a Great Night Out!

I have been toying with an idea for a while and Wednesday's Oprah was the thing that pushed me to move ahead with it.  I have teamed up with Alicia Richmond to do a workshop about looking great and feeling great.  Weight is not just about eating too much food.  Our bodies are constructed to not allow us to overeat.  Our minds, however, have no such restriction.  Food hugs our insides and fills our lives when we feel empty.  I believe wholeheartedly that one cannot successfully lose weight while any self loathing exists.  I could preach and teach, hand out meal plans and diet pills and never fix what is really broken.  Being skinny does not make life easy or better.  Making life "easier" and "better" really comes first.   

 Alicia and I have worked together on several occasions and what I love about her is that she helps you see your positive attributes - everyone has them.  I heard this quote lately "we are all good at something and only together are we perfect".  I believe that makes sense physically as well.  There is not a single person alive that looks at themselves buck naked in the mirror and loves everything they see.  Not one.  And, I would venture there isn't a person alive that looks in the mirror and sees their positive attributes before a good going over of the negative ones. Yet, the positives are there. You, right there reading this, have attributes that others admire and even covet - thinking their lives would be complete if only they had your_______! 

This workshop will do two things.  Alicia will work with you and point out your strengths as well as your body type.  Then she shows you how to work with your strengths.  She asks that you bring 6 items or 3 outfits that she can help you with.  She sends you home with a kit, a million tips and a higher self-esteem.

As for me, I go into my tips on losing weight and feeling great.  I cover basic food choices but really try to map out living a healthier lifestyle that is tailored for you by you.  My goal is to send you home empowered!

  There will be fun and food and a whole lot of info.  The class will cost $45 and seating is limited.  The where and when is TBA, but I am way excited!  

Email me at workshop@wingmantech.com to reserve a spot or for any questions.

Eat Less...Easy!

There is no way around it.  The reason I have lost weight is because I eat less than I used to.  Although the idea of less used to scare me, there were a few experiences that helped me "see the light".

My hubby had a friend at work whose  daughter was doing a Shakespearean theater dinner.  (Yes, this was you Sarah K.)  He bought our tickets and we went.  We did not know a soul there and were really there out of kindness and support (sorry Sarah, we didn't know you as well;).  Our dinner consisted of a salad, a chicken quarter (leg and thigh) mixed vegetables, some instant potatoes and maybe a roll.  The dessert was some kind of tart cheesecake thing, not really sure.  It was not horrible - regardless of how it sounds, it was good.  We ate very slowly, in three courses.  As we walked out I commented how although there was only a little food (by then standards) I was quite contented.  My hubby was still hungry but he gets an additional 1000 calories to be hungry with.  I, myself, was amazed.

I often reflect on that night as a learning point in my life.  One of my first goals was to stop eating after 7:30pm.  The first week was hard but then it wasn't.  To this day I feel a little sick when I eat later - not eating later was something that I never even considered before.  My appetite has definitely changed.  When the mental part is conquered the eating less is really not that hard.

Another example.  When my hubby and I were dating we would meet for lunch and our favorite spot was Arby's.  (Hey, we were right out of high school - yes, we were high school sweethearts.)
 Anywho, we would order a french dip with swiss - he the footlong and me the six inch, he with a'jus me without, both with lots and lots of Arby's sauce.  One day he ordered me a footlong and I remember being sickly stuffed.  I remember remembering that feeling one day when the footlong slid down to my tummy without a single struggle and I vowed to change.  I returned to the six inch and within a short period of time, didn't mind at all.  Same story with McDonald's two cheeseburger meal.  One burger really can cut it.  I was choosing more because... there was more.  The emotional part of me was in charge rather than my rational part.  Not that I would have cried without the extra six inches or burger but I definitely did not eat them out of hunger.

Find a time when the motivation is high and try cutting back - not cutting too much.  Test yourself for a week.  See if you really miss it.  Start small and work slowly and slowly twenty pounds will come off.  I am all for slow.  Slow helps conquer the same kinds of emotional triggers with the extra six inches and burger but in reverse.    

Pancake Poetry

Today was a momentous day.  For breakfast I made pancakes (YUM from Food Network's Good Eats) and my brown sugar syrup.  First, a little plug for these guys.  They are not fat-free or sugar-free or even all that healthy, but they are made out of my own ingredients and without all the preservatives and chemicals.  Try them try them and you may (like them) I say.  (in my best Dr Seuss;) 

Anyway, on to the point.  After 13 years, today was the first day I didn't cut a single pancake.  All the kiddos, with fork in hand, managed to get a saucer sized pancake into their tummies all by themselves.  One ate their pancakes more in layers but managed all the same.  I didn't refuse to cut, I just handed out plates and the next thing I knew food was gone.

My sweetie made me these pancakes for mother's day topped with apples.  Peel and slice the apples then squeeze a half of an orange over them in a bowl.  Add some brown sugar, cinnamon and anything apple pie ish.  Saute in a little butter and you will cry they are so good. (try it for father's day and you will be a big hero!)  

BTW today's breakfast of 3 buttermilk pancakes from scratch and syrup was 358 calories.  Not for everyday but on a rainy Tuesday, just the ticket!

The Truth is...

... I have been off.  Two weeks ago I started to get congestion and made a decision to not exercise.  I was going on a girls' trip and wanted to heal so I wouldn't keep everybody up all night with my cough.  It worked.  But, by the time I returned from the fun trip I had skipped a whole week of exercise.  Last Monday I got back on track until Thursday when several things kept me from exercising again.  It is normal that one day gets bumped here and there and I am usually okay with it.  This time I was too okay with it.  I have been in an eating mode for the last week.  Sometimes there seems to be sooo many calories I have to eat and other times my three meals a day are over the limit.  This was the latter mixed with the munchies mixed with the emotional "I need this".  I have wanted to stay in bed and sleep and veg as well.  Needless to say, I've lived the perfect storm to put on some pounds.  Although it has never been this bad, I am determined to stay the course. 

I am a creature of habit and regiment.  I like things to be predictable.  When things get changed up I want to know why.  But, this life is not predictable and the only thing constant is change right?  Funny thing is, it is not the pounds that bother me (today I weighed in at 136) it is this tired unmotivated feeling that I want to make disappear.  Yet, I know from experience that I must act first and the feeling and motivation will come later.  I know it but everything I feel wants me to doubt it. 

I hope you all out there are on a different track.  I hope you are pumped and lovin' life.  I hope spring has come in your journey as well as the weather. 

As for me, I am back to square one.  Back to self talk every morning.  Back to logging my food ahead of time.  Back to exercise.  Back to finding joy in other aspects of life besides food.  Back to the new me I like the most and hopefully back to under 135!    

Happy Mother's Day

My darling of a husband gave me three tins of Godiva Pearls for Mother's Day!  Three tins!!!  A small tear fell from my eye as I held them in my hand.

He found them at Smith's (Kroger).  Again, they are so yummy and only 25 calories for 8 little pearls of chocolate heaven.  ( the white chocolate has 30 calories) For anyone that is a chocolate lover these are thee gift of gifts.  They are about $4 per tin but that helps make them special.  These are not a share type of treat, they are to be selfishly devoured one by one - the louder the moans the better.  Me, I slap my thigh in delight.  Treat yourself and then let me know your "pearl" experience. 

    

Another Milestone

Two years ago this month was when I had my check up.  It was the first time I had had all my blood work done.  I was shocked to hear that my numbers were not all sunshine.  Remember, I never thought I had a weight problem, and didn't really.  I had birthed four humans out of this body - how could that not leave its mark?  I looked in the mirror and wished for that pre prego body but knew that I would not change having my little darlings for the world.

The doctor was not in panic mode.  He wanted to check the numbers in three months and sent me on my way.  I felt like I had been bonked in the head.  I remember being at a neighborhood party and being preoccupied with how much my life would change if I started medication to keep me alive and healthy at such a young age.  My mother always had health problems but since she carried a lot of weight I assumed I would take after my dad who's colds can be counted on one hand.

It was this kind of mindset I was in when Jennie walked herself into my house with a size 2 bod.  We had both had the same mom body.  No one would have ever looked at her and had any kind of reaction.  Jennie was just Jennie.  But, her numbers had motivated her and for some reason all of it motivated me.

Three months later my numbers were better and another three months was ordered.  After these three months the doctor was in pure amazement.   No one had ever reversed their numbers like this before.  He even asked me my methods for himself!

I am telling you people, this is not so much about size or the scale as it is feeling good and being healthy.  I feel a night and day difference in my body.  I am amazed at what my body can do.  I didn't know I was tired and achy after a walk until I wasn't.  Paying attention to what we put in our bodies has become an extreme lifestyle.  What?  (not to mention the why we put stuff into our bodies)

I honestly wish I had a magic wand that would make it all easy.  I would lend it out for free.  But, this learning journey has been such an exciting and wonderful one that I wish that for you more.  

Cheers!

There are times when I am around people that give you "the look".  If the "the look" could talk it would say something like this, "you poor sap that has to worry over every bite and has to exercise".  Like I have said before, I have given that look plenty of times.  I totally understand that point of view.  But, if that old look-giving-me knew what I know now...

I have gotten the same look from people not understanding how I could enjoy a party without a bar.  There is joy to be had at a virgin party (that sounds really bad) and there is joy to be found watching what I eat.  I am totally addicted.  I love learning about food and what I can have a lot of verses what I can only have a little.

I have new truths to my life that I wouldn't change for the world.  I am reminded of an earlier post.  It is worth a reread, if I do say so myself:D.

Reward!

I was thinking the other day that I never gave myself any rewards for whatever milestones I hit.  I wondered what I thought about this realization.  So, here are my thoughts on the subject.

I do not like rewards in the normal sense.  For me, they make me feel like I am unworthy until...which makes me unworthy now.  One's weight can never define you.  If you feel that way than you have just discovered your first mountain to climb or goal to achieve.  This mountain can take the longest to conquer but it must be done.

There are going to be those times when it is an uphill climb.  Those are the times when a boost is really needed.  Getting to your goal is reward enough.  Instead of feeling bad about yourself during the climbs, give yourself a boost - that is what you really need.  Go get a spray tan or a pedicure.  Pamper that you because she is struggling and IT IS OK TO STRUGGLE.  Yes, I am yelling!  There are times when the choices are easy and other times when you just want to give up on the whole thing.  So, instead of "reward" I guess I am more the "motivator" type.  

Be your own best cheerleader!

100 pounds of Inspiration

Check out this blog!

http://www.healthystride.blogspot.com/

A kindred loser;D

Kids snack

I have been putting together little trail mixes for the kids and it has been great.  I am always finding new things to add.  The best part is that you can look at whatever is on sale that week and save money too.  Also, putting them together in a mix helps them last longer.  For instance, I can make three batches of mix with a bag of chocolate chips when just the bag would last mere minutes around here.

Here are some mix ideas.  Use some or all!

Pretzels
cereal (I use two different kinds and the healthy ones get eaten too)
mini marshmellows
chocolate chips
dried fruit (raisins, cherries, even bananas)
coconut
nuts
M&Ms
any more ideas?