Today's weight 134
I see a pattern here that I know I need to work on. Since I have lost weight, I get a little frustrated at people that think I starve myself or, more likely, deprive myself of delicious foods in order to stay thin. I have gotten used to that almost sympathetic, half, pity smile that is really more about what is going on inside of the other person's head than about me. The old me would have maybe given that same look. However, now I hate it. Yes, I spend more time "worrying" about what I eat and how I move my body, but I think of that time as a privilege not a burden. This is my health and if I take it for granted then shame on me when it goes away.
Anyway, the pattern. When I get this way I tend to eat more or eat poorly in a kind of sticking out my tongue to these kind of people. Being out here naked and vulnerable I see myself doing the same thing. I want to prove that I can eat more than just a salad and I think over the past week I have demonstrated that too well. Two weeks back from vacation and I am in a little panic over the 134. Isn't that crazy? About this time I see two distinct paths in front of me. One says "cut back, add veggies, plan ahead, no sugar" and the other says "don't panic, it takes time". In another week if the same numbers still exist I doubt what ever path I have taken and not until I take that deep breath and take back my confidence does the scale start to tip in my direction.
Breakfast: fruit smoothie (Silk unsweetened organic soy milk, banana, strawberries, frozen peaches and cherries, frozen OJ, some honey and vanilla)
I put in 300 calories
Lunch - 10 SunChips, 1/2 cup fat free cottage cheese, 1 orange, 5 mini carrots, 1 slice lunch ham
286 calories (I will need a afternoon snack for sure - too little calories)
snack - 1 1/2 servings of Jelly Bellys - not the best snack but I was out and about and it was too late for a filling snack
210 calories
Dinner - Homemade lasagna (love the Barilla lasagna noodles - no boil), salad, Wishbone ranch spray dressing (for 10 more calories I could have had Hidden Valley fat free:()
585 calories
Dessert - 1 cup sugar free Swiss Miss hot cocoa. Plus another serving of Jelly Bellys.
200 calories
Still came in under my break even by 63 calories - yee haw and a bag of jelly beans (oops, already ate one)!
Okay... I guess I get to eat my eggs now. :) You were lower, even after the day of sugar. Way to go!
ReplyDeleteI guess it is true though. If I think about it, maybe one day won't impact me that much. It is when I eat the eggs every day and not balance it out that I do the most damage to myself.
I'll have to try the Lasagna noodles. I've never loved making lasagna because of the time. Cut out the boil part and maybe I'll think about it.
I'm a little late catching up on your posts. You're awesome for doing this! I keep telling myself "I'll lose weight after Easter and all the candy is gone". Or "I'll buy those pants when I lose weight". Arg! I need some major motivation. For one, I don't have a gym pass or a treadmill at home. I just started your famous arm exercises 2 days ago and I'm sore. Baby steps, right?
ReplyDelete