Consequently

A few weeks ago we sat down our kids for a little family meeting - we try to do this weekly.  I told them I wanted to take all that they have learned about good and bad and right and wrong and throw it out the window.  I told them that what really matters are the consequences and if they are desirable or not.  This was spurred by a discussion on lying.  There isn't a clear cut line on that one.  While it is lying to tell someone on the phone that mom is in the tub when she is not really home,  the positive consequences of that choice to "lie" outweighs the negative ones.  Does that make sense?  As we continued to talk we thought about a dozen or so choices, mostly negative choices, and their consequences.  "You could choose to take drugs or cheat on the test, but you cannot choose the consequences and the chances are high that they would not be positive".

I wanted to take the conversation a little further.  I set out five different flavors of Dippin' Dots.  I let one kid pick one that he wanted to taste.  He did, I asked him if it was good - if he was happy with his choice.  I then pointed out that a consequence of his choice was that he got to taste that particular flavor.  That was a consequence - a  positive one.  Also, that he missed out on four other flavors.  I asked him what he thought about that consequence, after a minute he could see that there was power in being able to make a choice - a great consequence.  Also, that enjoying what he chose was... enjoyable.  He really wasn't thinking about what he was missing.

I think this concept directly relates to eating well.  Get the good and bad out of your thinking.  The cycle of good happy and bad sad creates an emotional cycle that begs for weight to pack on.  The consequence of eating a double cheeseburger has its negative consequences for sure but once in a while there is a time when a positive will outweigh them.  Careful, there is a thin line here.  You might be fooled into thinking "you are having a bad day and a double cheese will make it all better".  That takes some more thinking.  Only you can really make that choice and deal with its consequences both good and bad.